Writing Your Wedding Vows

Consult these wedding vows tips before you put pen to paper.

Looking for ways to personalize your wedding ceremony? Consider incorporating your own carefully chosen words into this momentous occasion, and build the foundation for a life-long relationship. Writing your own wedding vows is definitely an ambitious undertaking. Not only must you determine the perfect words to say, but those words must be rehearsed and recited in front of your closest family and friends on a day that will be one of the most important of your life. Relax and take a deep breath. We know it’s intimidating… but imagine penning your own wedding vows with promises from the heart. That incentive will make the task worthwhile.

Before Starting Your Wedding Vows:

• Get approval. Talk to your officiant to make sure personal vows are even allowed. Some religions object to non-secular expressions during the wedding ceremony. Even with the go-ahead, submit your personalized vows to your officiant for review before the big day; he or she may have specific objections or even helpful ideas.
• Establish an estimated length. Your audience will find it odd and even comical if one rambles for 5 minutes while the other says 10 words.
• Be succinct. Overly lengthy wedding vows may lose your audience and will only increase the potential for error.
• Review them in front of someone else. You can rehearse with each other, or if you’d rather keep them a surprise, read your vows to a trusted loved one.
• Have a cheat sheet. Even if you plan to memorize them, the nerves may kick in when the big moment arrives. To avoid a potentially awkward scene at the wedding ceremony, bring a cheat sheet just in case.

Wedding Vows – What to Say?

Suffering from a case of writer’s block? To get you started, here are some useful ideas and resources to spark your creativity.

Consult your past
Time for a trip down memory lane. Start jotting down the details of special firsts in your relationship – first meeting, first date, first kiss, first “I love you,” etc. What qualities made you fall in love in the first place? Are there special milestones in your relationship that that have helped bring you here today?

Envision the future
What challenges and achievements do you foresee in the future, and how do you expect to meet those things together?

Complete me
Sure, it’s a line from a movie, but there’s a reason for its now cliche status. What characteristics does he/she bring out in you? How does he/she make you a better person? Don’t forget that marriage should be about being two whole, individual people coming together in a beautiful union, not about relying on that person to make your life complete.

Use the right words
Compile your notes, memories, and reflections, and begin turning words into sentences, and finally sentences into wedding vows. Consult your thesaurus for the perfect expressions to reflect your thoughts. Some words to get you started: love, trust, support, strength, encourage, respect, cherish, admire, value, commit, pledge, and promise.